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'Twas The Night Before Newsday 12-25-05

'Twas The Night Before News Day

 'Twas the night before news day, and down in the basement,

 Articles waited for newspaper placement.

 Photos were half-toned, and advertisements designed,

 Ready for paste-up; proofed, waxed and aligned.

 The computer was humming, the waxer was hot,

 Ready for Newton, who appeared not.

 So Bill and I both, with glasses on our face

 Stayed late to put everything in its proper place.

 When out of the printer, there began to rise smoke!

And Bill tried to put it out with his Coke!

 On the way to the outlet, I fell in a sprawl,

 But still managed to unplug the machine from the wall.

The plastic had melted, the paper had charred

 The cord to the central unit was marred.

 So Bill ran to my office, up street and up stair

 To swipe the laser printer we use up there.

 With the printer in place, we began work again,

 Rewriting, editing and pasting and then,

 We came upon another printer kink,

When it appeared on the monitor, “You’re out of ink!”

We dug though the shelves and we dug in the stacks,

 And while we were looking, we ran out of wax.

As we hung our heads and stamped our feet,

 We heard a ruckus out on Main Street.

Distracted from our grief, we went to the door,

 To see a box at the threshold, but nothing more.

 As we opened the door to examine the prize

 We heard a greeting called from the skies:

“Don’t worry, it’s Christmas! Don’t get the blues!

 The Calhoun community will still get their news!”

 We looked at each other with confusion and fright,

 Thinking some freak had come out in the night.

 We opened the box with caution and care,

 You will not believe what we found in there.

A new printer! With lots and lots of ink!

 A new waxer with wax! We were tickled pink!

 New cameras, and iPods, and office supplies!

 The valuable gift brought tears to our eyes.

  We returned to our task, with glee and with joy,

 So pleased to be working with fancy new toys.

When we finished, Bill looked down in the box again,

 Where he found a letter written in pen,

 “Merry Christmas to The Chronicle and all those who read.

 I love this weekly newspaper, yes indeed!

 Do me this favor, or you’ll end up with coal,

 Send a free subscription to,

 Santa Claus,

 North Pole.”

This Week's Editorial:

By Helen Morris:

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